[OT] joining the "elite" team

[OT] joining the "elite" team

[Alfie John]

Hello,

I write to you in response to an add I saw at seek.com.au, "OBJECT ORIENTED 
PROGRAMMER -MELBOURNE RECENT GRADUATE" - 
http://it.seek.com.au/users/viewdetails.asp?Action=jobsearch&JobListAction=ViewOneAd&JobSearch=true&AdID=2731247

I find this add highly arrogant and highly contradictive.

You start with "seeking for ...FIRST CLASS HONOURS", however your add is 
basically searching for a top class, 313373 computer geek. As history shows, 
even hacker's hackers like RMS and Linus had not-so "first class" grades 
while in high school AND at uni because they were too busy with selfish 
delites such as churning through kernel code.

The next contradictive statement is "She or he must have an INTRINSIC 
understanding of computing". But later you provide insight to your company 
with "The applications are an amalgam of complex business processes, 
maximisation of resources, and require considerable mathematical acumen." In 
other words, you need MS Excel shitkickers with knowledge in business 
management with contemporary management skills and not elite coders with 
sk1llZ. Also, I don't really understand why "indepth knowledge of OOP" is 
going to help me with optimizing functions with spreadsheets.

"The company only employs THE BEST AND BRIGHTEST"; followed by "It is very 
sophisticated." and the even more arrogant "An average person will be unable 
to keep up with the high intellectual horsepower generated by the members of 
this elite team.". This tells the reader that you MUST have the worlds best 
coders under your organization and yet you are "GROWING AND PROFITABLE".

I must go now with my pittyful programming skills which are no where near 
the "EXCEPTIONALLY GOOD" skills that your company is looking for, but I 
smile just to know that this email is going to be forwarded to programmers 
around the world with a link to your add to show just what an "elite team" 
you really are!

int 20h;
Alfie John

_________________________________________________________________
Get mobile Hotmail. Go to  http://ninemsn.com.au/mobilecentral/signup.asp

Re: [OT] joining the "elite" team

[Andre Hedrick]

Alfie,

Did you not get hired, and your arse is a weee bit on the chapped side?

grep -in hotmail /etc/mail/access
534:hotmail.com                 REJECT

I am a weee bit chapped because "hotmail.com" did not get rejected!

Have a good'ay

Cheer,

Andre Hedrick
LAD Storage Consulting Group

On Fri, 13 Jun 2003, Alfie John wrote:

> Hello,
> 
> I write to you in response to an add I saw at seek.com.au, "OBJECT ORIENTED 
> PROGRAMMER -MELBOURNE RECENT GRADUATE" - 
> http://it.seek.com.au/users/viewdetails.asp?Action=jobsearch&JobListAction=ViewOneAd&JobSearch=true&AdID=2731247
> 
> I find this add highly arrogant and highly contradictive.
> 
> You start with "seeking for ...FIRST CLASS HONOURS", however your add is 
> basically searching for a top class, 313373 computer geek. As history shows, 
> even hacker's hackers like RMS and Linus had not-so "first class" grades 
> while in high school AND at uni because they were too busy with selfish 
> delites such as churning through kernel code.
> 
> The next contradictive statement is "She or he must have an INTRINSIC 
> understanding of computing". But later you provide insight to your company 
> with "The applications are an amalgam of complex business processes, 
> maximisation of resources, and require considerable mathematical acumen." In 
> other words, you need MS Excel shitkickers with knowledge in business 
> management with contemporary management skills and not elite coders with 
> sk1llZ. Also, I don't really understand why "indepth knowledge of OOP" is 
> going to help me with optimizing functions with spreadsheets.
> 
> "The company only employs THE BEST AND BRIGHTEST"; followed by "It is very 
> sophisticated." and the even more arrogant "An average person will be unable 
> to keep up with the high intellectual horsepower generated by the members of 
> this elite team.". This tells the reader that you MUST have the worlds best 
> coders under your organization and yet you are "GROWING AND PROFITABLE".
> 
> I must go now with my pittyful programming skills which are no where near 
> the "EXCEPTIONALLY GOOD" skills that your company is looking for, but I 
> smile just to know that this email is going to be forwarded to programmers 
> around the world with a link to your add to show just what an "elite team" 
> you really are!
> 
> int 20h;
> Alfie John
> 
> _________________________________________________________________
> Get mobile Hotmail. Go to  http://ninemsn.com.au/mobilecentral/signup.asp
> 
> -
> To unsubscribe from this list: send the line "unsubscribe linux-kernel" in
> the body of a message to majordomo@vger.kernel.org
> More majordomo info at  http://vger.kernel.org/majordomo-info.html
> Please read the FAQ at  http://www.tux.org/lkml/
> 

Re: [ajug] [OT] joining the "elite" team

[Miles Bader]

"Chris Harrison" <java_solutions@bigpond.com> writes:
> And the best one, "[our company]...is very sophisticated."  Yes, like the
> sophisticated advertisement you came up with.

At least they didn't use `dynamic' or `world class' (hmmm, maybe those
are 20th century buzzwords...).

-miles
-- 
`To alcohol!  The cause of, and solution to,
 all of life's problems' --Homer J. Simpson

Re: [OT] joining the "elite" team

[David B. Stevens]

Typical HR wonk speak.  The clue less ones at work, nothing here for you, move along now ;)

Cheers





Alfie John wrote:
> Hello,
> 
> I write to you in response to an add I saw at seek.com.au, "OBJECT 
> ORIENTED PROGRAMMER -MELBOURNE RECENT GRADUATE" - 
> http://it.seek.com.au/users/viewdetails.asp?Action=jobsearch&JobListAction=ViewOneAd&JobSearch=true&AdID=2731247 
> 
> 
> I find this add highly arrogant and highly contradictive.
> 
> You start with "seeking for ...FIRST CLASS HONOURS", however your add is 
> basically searching for a top class, 313373 computer geek. As history 
> shows, even hacker's hackers like RMS and Linus had not-so "first class" 
> grades while in high school AND at uni because they were too busy with 
> selfish delites such as churning through kernel code.
> 
> The next contradictive statement is "She or he must have an INTRINSIC 
> understanding of computing". But later you provide insight to your 
> company with "The applications are an amalgam of complex business 
> processes, maximisation of resources, and require considerable 
> mathematical acumen." In other words, you need MS Excel shitkickers with 
> knowledge in business management with contemporary management skills and 
> not elite coders with sk1llZ. Also, I don't really understand why 
> "indepth knowledge of OOP" is going to help me with optimizing functions 
> with spreadsheets.
> 
> "The company only employs THE BEST AND BRIGHTEST"; followed by "It is 
> very sophisticated." and the even more arrogant "An average person will 
> be unable to keep up with the high intellectual horsepower generated by 
> the members of this elite team.". This tells the reader that you MUST 
> have the worlds best coders under your organization and yet you are 
> "GROWING AND PROFITABLE".
> 
> I must go now with my pittyful programming skills which are no where 
> near the "EXCEPTIONALLY GOOD" skills that your company is looking for, 
> but I smile just to know that this email is going to be forwarded to 
> programmers around the world with a link to your add to show just what 
> an "elite team" you really are!
> 
> int 20h;
> Alfie John
> 
> _________________________________________________________________
> Get mobile Hotmail. Go to  http://ninemsn.com.au/mobilecentral/signup.asp
> 
> -
> To unsubscribe from this list: send the line "unsubscribe linux-kernel" in
> the body of a message to majordomo@vger.kernel.org
> More majordomo info at  http://vger.kernel.org/majordomo-info.html
> Please read the FAQ at  http://www.tux.org/lkml/
> 


-- 
      _o)(o_    one fine day in the middle of the night (o_   .
    -./\\//\.-  two dead men got up to fight            //\.-'  |/~\|
     _\_UU_/_   back to back they faced each other      U_/_    |_ /o:__
     """"""""""     drew their swords & shot each other!""""""""(_/\_/

Re: [OT] joining the "elite" team

[Richard B. Johnson]

On Fri, 13 Jun 2003, David B. Stevens wrote:

> Typical HR wonk speak.  The clue less ones at work, nothing here
> for you, move along now ;)
>
> Cheers
>

This following is an explanation of the most common
Human Resources buzz-speak. It is by no means complete.


        Wanted : Recent graduate, maximum of 5 years experience.
Interpretation : Anybody over 30 need not apply.
        Wanted : Team player.
Interpretation : Need somebody to take the blame for failure.
        Wanted : Excellent interpersonal skills.
Interpretation : Needs to kiss a lot of ass.
        Wanted : Experience in Antidisestablishmentarianism.
Interpretation : Getting an existing employee a green-card.
        Wanted : Excellent salary and benefits.
Interpretation : They provide health care through the Red Cross.
        Wanted : Excellent communications skills.
Interpretation : Knows Microsoft Word.
        Wanted : Relocation assistance provided.
Interpretation : Cross-country bus fare to interview is provided.

Cheers,
Dick Johnson
Penguin : Linux version 2.4.20 on an i686 machine (797.90 BogoMips).
Why is the government concerned about the lunatic fringe? Think about it.

Re: [OT] joining the "elite" team

[David B. Stevens]

Richard B. Johnson wrote:
> On Fri, 13 Jun 2003, David B. Stevens wrote:
> 
> 
>>Typical HR wonk speak.  The clue less ones at work, nothing here
>>for you, move along now ;)
>>
>>Cheers
>>
> 
> 
> This following is an explanation of the most common
> Human Resources buzz-speak. It is by no means complete.
> 
> 
>         Wanted : Recent graduate, maximum of 5 years experience.
> Interpretation : Anybody over 30 need not apply.

Real meaning : We are cheap and don't want to pay real money.


>         Wanted : Team player.
> Interpretation : Need somebody to take the blame for failure.

Real meaning : You are ALREADY ******.

>         Wanted : Excellent interpersonal skills.
> Interpretation : Needs to kiss a lot of ass.

Ringy ding right on.

>         Wanted : Experience in Antidisestablishmentarianism.
> Interpretation : Getting an existing employee a green-card.

Ringy ding right on.

>         Wanted : Excellent salary and benefits.
> Interpretation : They provide health care through the Red Cross.

Ringy ding right on.

>         Wanted : Excellent communications skills.
> Interpretation : Knows Microsoft Word.

Real meaning : We are hoping you can teach us how to communicate.

>         Wanted : Relocation assistance provided.
> Interpretation : Cross-country bus fare to interview is provided.

Without any in transit videos.

> 
> Cheers,
> Dick Johnson
> Penguin : Linux version 2.4.20 on an i686 machine (797.90 BogoMips).
> Why is the government concerned about the lunatic fringe? Think about it.
> 
> 

Cheers,

RE: [ajug] [OT] joining the "elite" team

[Chris Harrison]

Yep, I totally agree, its unacceptable, a few points:

"...with FIRST CLASS HONOURS  in Computer Science or a similar degree..."
then "...must be a UNIVERSITY graduate...".
The former cancels the latter.  Although, they might be making a point that
'internet degrees' from Spam mail don't count.

"...who is REALLY EXCEPTIONALLY GOOD at it...", as opposed to really crap at
it?  or maybe partially exceptional at it?

And the best one, "[our company]...is very sophisticated."  Yes, like the
sophisticated advertisement you came up with.

My five year old daughter actually has better grasp of grammar than this
ad...

Chris.

> -----Original Message-----
> From: Alfie John [mailto:alfiejohn@hotmail.com]
> Sent: Thursday, 12 June 2003 7:49 PM
> To: jobs@interlogic.com.au; vox@lists.lugod.org;
> linux-kernel@vger.kernel.org; ajug@yahoogroups.com
> Subject: [ajug] [OT] joining the "elite" team
>
>
> Hello,
>
> I write to you in response to an add I saw at seek.com.au,
> "OBJECT ORIENTED
> PROGRAMMER -MELBOURNE RECENT GRADUATE" -
> http://it.seek.com.au/users/viewdetails.asp?Action=jobsearch&JobLi
> stAction=ViewOneAd&JobSearch=true&AdID=2731247
>
> I find this add highly arrogant and highly contradictive.
>
> You start with "seeking for ...FIRST CLASS HONOURS", however your add is
> basically searching for a top class, 313373 computer geek. As
> history shows,
> even hacker's hackers like RMS and Linus had not-so "first class" grades
> while in high school AND at uni because they were too busy with selfish
> delites such as churning through kernel code.
>
> The next contradictive statement is "She or he must have an INTRINSIC
> understanding of computing". But later you provide insight to
> your company
> with "The applications are an amalgam of complex business processes,
> maximisation of resources, and require considerable mathematical
> acumen." In
> other words, you need MS Excel shitkickers with knowledge in business
> management with contemporary management skills and not elite coders with
> sk1llZ. Also, I don't really understand why "indepth knowledge of OOP" is
> going to help me with optimizing functions with spreadsheets.
>
> "The company only employs THE BEST AND BRIGHTEST"; followed by
> "It is very
> sophisticated." and the even more arrogant "An average person
> will be unable
> to keep up with the high intellectual horsepower generated by the
> members of
> this elite team.". This tells the reader that you MUST have the
> worlds best
> coders under your organization and yet you are "GROWING AND PROFITABLE".
>
> I must go now with my pittyful programming skills which are no where near
> the "EXCEPTIONALLY GOOD" skills that your company is looking for, but I
> smile just to know that this email is going to be forwarded to
> programmers
> around the world with a link to your add to show just what an
> "elite team"
> you really are!
>
> int 20h;
> Alfie John
>
> _________________________________________________________________
> Get mobile Hotmail. Go to  http://ninemsn.com.au/mobilecentral/signup.asp
>
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Re: [ajug] [OT] joining the "elite" team

[Alfie John]

As requested, the add plus my reply has been submitted to 
http://www.fuckthatjob.com

int 20h;
Alfie John

_________________________________________________________________
Get mobile Hotmail. Go to  http://ninemsn.com.au/mobilecentral/signup.asp